pair  AMES’ SERIES  OF 

STANDARD  AM)  MINOR  DRAMA, 


I 


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i 

:  • ,  &/ 


v 


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Mo.  57. 


Paddy  Miles’  Boy. 


{FARCE.) 


B  i 

fc- 

3  i 


WITH  CART  OF  CHARACTERS,  ENTRANCES,  ANT)  EXITS,  RELATIVE  POSITIONS 
THE  PERFORMERS  ON  THE  STAGE,  DESCRIPTION  OF  COSTUMES  AND 
THE  WHOLE  OF  THE  STAGE  BUSINESS,  CAREFULLY 
MARKED  FROM  THE  MOST  APPROVED 
ACTING  COPY. 


OF 


PRICE  15  CENTS. 


CLYDE,  OHIO : 

AMES’  PUBLISHING  CO, 


M. 


A 


Digitized  by  the  Internet  Archive 
in  2019  with  funding  from 

University  of  Illinois  Urbana-Champaign  Alternates 


https://archive.org/details/paddymilesboyiriOOpilg 


PADDY  MILES’  BOY; 


»  |aw. 


i 


« 

nr  ONE  ACT* 


BY  JAMES  PILGRIM, 


WITH  A  DESCRIPTION  OF  COSTUMES,  CAST  OF  THE  CHARACTERS, 
RELATIVE  POSITION  OF  PERFORMERS  ON  THE  STAGE,  ENTRANCES 
AND  EXITS,  AND  THE  WHOLE  OF  THE  STAGE  BUSINESS.^ 

**  A  s  performed  at  the  principal  American  and  English  Theatres. 

| 


—CLYDE,  OHIO!— 

A*  D.  AMES,  PUBLISHER. 


I 


\ 


PADDY  MILES'  EOY. 

- o - 


Cast  of  characters  as 

performed  at  Sadler  Wells  Theatre. 

Taddy  Miles  . 

Dr.  Coates  . . . 

.  Mr.  J.  Pilgrim 

Henry  . 

Job  . 

.  Mr.  Suter 

Reuben  . 

Mrs.  Fidget  . 

Jane  .  . 

- x - 

t 

Cast  of  characters  as  performed  at  Terry’s  Hall,  Clyde,  Ohio,  Monday 

Evening,  January  1st.,  1872. 


Paddy  Miles 
Dr.  Coates  . . 

Henry . 

Job . . 

Reuben . 

Mrs.  Fidget. 
Jane . 


. Vet  Cooke • 

..  A.  D.  Ames • 
Wm.  Blanchard. 
..  W.  H.  Arlin. 
_  C.  E.  Perry. 

Mary  Sweet  I  and. 
....  Maud  Ames. 


- x - 

TIME  OF  PERFORMANCE— FORTY-FIVE  MINUTES. 

- x - 


Paddy  Miles — Gray  frieze  coat,  red  vest,  blue  handkerchief,  corduroy 
breeches. 

Dr.  Coates — Black  cut-away  coat,  embroidered  vest,  black  breeches, 
black  stockings,  shoes  and  buckles,  white  neckcloth,  white  wig,  c  a  e. 

llarry — Modern  walking  suit. 

Job — White  shirt,  red  vest,  black  velveteen  breeches,  green  apron,  hi=h« 
low  shoes,  gray  stockings,  colored  handkerchief,  brown  head  of  hair. 

Reuben — Green  shooting  coat,  white  pearl  buttons,  plus  1  vest,  dab 
breeches,  blue  stockings,  high-low  shoes,  colored  cravat,  countryman’s  ha  t 

Mrs.  Fidget — Old  lady’s  dre»a. 

Jane — Walking  dress. 


3 


PADDY  MILES’  BOY. 


ACT  I. 

SCENE  FIRS  T. — Cottage  flats  5 th  grooves.  Garden  ivall  across  stage  4th  grooves  with  C. 
gales,  practical.  Set  house  r.  2  e.  ,  practical  door  with  brass  plate,  on  it 1  Dr.  Coates.  Upper 
window  over  door,  practical ,  backed  by  interior.  Set  hut  L.  3  E.  Sign  post  and  swing  sign  on 
E.  3  E. ,  lPiy  and  Whistle .’  Enter  Harry ,  I,. 

Harry.  Good  heavens,  it  seems  long  !  If  I  could  but  see  my  dear  Jane,  I  wouldn’t 
care,  but  that  cursed  Mrs.  Fidget,  and  Job  the  gardener,  are  so  careful,  I  have  no 
chance.  However,  I'll  run  to  the  back  gate — perchance  I  may  see  her  at  the  window. 

{Exit  r.  2  E. 

Enter  Paddy ,  l.  1  e.,  singing,  wilhbundle  and,  stick. 

Pad.  Here  I  am  all  the  way  from  Limerick;  bad  luck  to  my  ould  father’s  name.  It 
anything  was  done  in  Limerick,  and  you  only  asked  who  did  it,  they  would  be  sure  to 
sav  it  was  Paddy  Miles’  boy:  then  I  came  hereto  live  wkI  Mister  Kireshovel — by  my 
sowl,  it  was  all  the  same.  Who  broke  the  plates  and  dishes?  Paddy  Miles’  boy.  Who 
broke  the  pony’s  knee?  Paddy  Miles’  boy.  Who  put  the  cockles  on  the  cat’s  feet? 
Paddy  Miles’  boy.  Who  let  the  dog  out  and  killed  all  the  cocks,  hens  and  chickens? 
Paddy  Miles’  boy.  Bad  luck  to  Paddy  Miles’  boy,  says  my  master— I’ll  kick  him  out 
of  the  house — and  he  done  it.  And  here  I  am,  an  independent  gintlemen,  out  of  placo, 
wid  one  shilling  in  my  pocket,  and  all  through  being  Paddy  Miles’  boy.  What  to  do 
I  don’t  know.  A  lucky  thought  has  run  through  the  top  of  my  house — I’ll  change  my 
name — I’ve  heard  talk  of  the  same  thing  being  done,  but  that  was  by  paying  a  big  sum 
of  money;  faith,  its  come  to  this,  I’ll  take  Frinch  leave;  so  here  goes;  it  shall  be  Paddy 
O’Connor,  and  I’ll  loot  after  some  one  to  make  a  master  of. 

Enter  Harry  from  the  Doctor's  shop,  r.  2  e. 

Young  man,  you  seem  at  a  loss  which  way  to  go.  Are  you  in  want  of  a  situa- 

( aside )  How  the  divil  did  he  know  that?  {aloud)  Sure  that’s  the  thing  I  do 


& 

c 


O 


Har. 
tion  ? 

Pad. 

want, 

Har. 

Pad. 


<b 


Ind*  ed  !  Would  you  have  any  objections  to  serve  a  doctor  ? 

Serve  a  doctor!  Ha,  ha,  ha!  By  me  sowl  I  should  niver  be  able  to  take  all 
the  physic  he  would  be  afther  giving  me. 

Har.  {laughing)  Ha,  ha,  ha!  My  good  fellow,  you  will  have  no  medicine  to  swal¬ 
low — merely  carry  it  around  to  our  customers.  My  father  wants  a  lad,  and  by  your  ap¬ 
pearance,  1  think  you’ll  suit  Twenty  pounds  a  year,  with  board  and  lodging— man¬ 
age  a  few  private’  affairs  for  rue,  which  is  all  that  will  be  required. 

Pad,  Twenty  pounds !  Say  it  agin’ — your  joking. 

Har.  Indeed,  I’m  not.  I  repeat  that  you  will  have  twenty  pounds  per  year,  board, 
washing  and  lodging. 

Pad.  Twenty  pounds  a  year !  I’ll  go  home,  buy  Ireland  and  sink  it;  if  that’s  all 
you’ll  require,  I’m  theone  for  ye’s — sure  I  can  tell  a  lie  and  kape  a  sacret  better  than 
any  l  oy  in  the  parish. 

Har.  Well,  consider  yourself  engaged.  But  where  did  you  live  last?  What’s  your 
name  ?  Of  course  you  have  a  character. 

Pad.  I  suppose  ivery  man  has  a  character.  I’ve  come  from  Limerick— my  name's 
Paddy  O’Connor,  {feeling  in  pockets)  My  character  is  like  a  wild  colt — it’s  got  into 
some  corner.  ( finds  it  in  his  hat)  Here  it  is,  from  my  ould  master,  Larry  O’Brallig 
’an  Calligan  McFousel.  ( gives  paper 

Har.  {reading)  “ Paddy  Miles  worked  for  me  at  the  bogs  of  Limerick— was  an  hon¬ 
est,  decent  boy— left  on  his  own  account — as  the  girls  woulu  be  telling  lieson  him.” 

Pad.  Yes,  and  tickling  me. 

Har.  {aside)  So,  so  1  He  has  had  some  experience  with  the  fair  sex,  and  will  answer 
my  purpose  the  better;  but  you  told  me  your  name  was  Paddy  O’Connor. 

Pad.  Thin  I  tould  you  a  lie.  Now  I’ll  teU  you  the  trutU.  Wlxeu  I  was  at  Limenck 
the  daxUu’  place— was  you  tver  there,  sir  ? 


4 


PADDY  MILES’  BOY. 


JTar.  Never. 

Pad.  Thin  you  missed  3  big  sight,  I  can  tell  you.  When  I  was  at  Limerick,  as  I 
said  before,  I  was  sure  to  be  in  some  trouble — whatever  was  going  astray,  Paddy  Miles’ 
boy  was  sure  to  be  doing  it;  so  U  keep  out  of  scrapes,  I  changed  my  name  like  my  sis¬ 
ter  Judy,  only,  ye  see,  she  got  married  and  I  didn’t,  and  as  I  wished  to  be  a  res  pec  ta 
ble  member  of  society,  and  as  I’mgoing  to  leap  1  a  s  >  iet  for  you,  faith,  I  don’t  think 
I’ll  be  axing  such  a  mighty  dale  too  much,  for  you  to  do  the  same  for  me;  and  wheu  a 
man  is  bothered,  what  can  be  so  delightful  as  a  true  and  confidential  friend 

Har.  True,  Paddy  1  I’ll  keep  your  secret  for  you,  but  when  you  meet  my  father, 
mind  your  P’s  and  Q’s.  ( exit  int a  <loctor's  shop,  r  2  k. 

Pad.  [feeling  in  his  pockets)  Stop,  sir  l  Mister  l  sir,  sir  1  Bedad  but  he  might  wain 
the  character  for  himself. 

Re-enter  Harry ,  R.  2,  a- 
You  forgot  to  give  me  baqk  my  character. 

Har  True,  here  it  is.  (exit  R.  2  s. 

Pad  I  am  engaged  wid  twenty  pounds  a  year,  breakfast,  dinner  and  supper,  wid  a 
docthur — ir  he  only  knew  it  was  Paady  Miles’  boy,  I’d  be  kicked  out.  I’m  to  kape  a 
secret— that  will  be  no  aisy  matter  And  tell  a  lie — that’s  the  rub  for  me.  Sure  I’ll 
nivet  git  to  LimeriCh.,  where  paraties  cost  nothing,  and  butthermilk  half  the  price — but 
it’s  no  use  thinking  of  the  days  gone  by — I’ll  take  some  whiskey  punch,  and  drink  long 
life  to  the  boy  that  brewed  it — faith  it  reminds  me  of  home  when  I  was  the  ladies'  dar¬ 
ling.  ( song  and  business  introduced ,  after  which  exit  into  ‘ Pig  and  Whistle ’  l.  3  e. 

Enter  Reuben ,  n.  1  e. 

Reu .  Ha,  ha,  ha!  Well,  I  can’t  help  thinking  how  nicely  I’ve  been  tricked  by 
Miles’  boy — ha,  ha,  ha !  He  must  be  a  rum  chap  to  be  sure — went  three  miles  for  a  job. 
“Who  sent  you  ?”  said  the  farmer.  “Why,  Miles,  bry,”  said  I.  ‘ 'Devil  take  Miles’ 
boy,”  said  he — ha,  ha,  ha!  “What  for?”  said  I.  “He  sent  me  twenty  other  chaps 
about  the  same  thing,”  said  he — ha,  ha,  ha!  All  the  places  I  went,  they  told  me  the 
same  story— ha,  ha,  ha!  Now,  as  I’ve  been  made  such  a  fool  of  by  Miles’  boy,  I  don’t 
see  why  I  shouldn’t  make  a  fool  of  somebody  else,  and  tell  him  it*  was  Miles’  boy — ha, 
ha,  ha !  Dr.  Coates  lives  here;  I’ll  tell  him  that  Farmer  Saddletree  be  dying  —  ha,  ha, 
ha  !  ( knocks  at  door)  Doctor,  doctor  ! 

Doc.  ( looks  out  of  window )  My  good  fellow,  what  i°  the  matter  that  you  bawl  so  loud  ? 

Reu.  The  matter  be  that  Farmer  Saddletree  be  taker  very  ill,  am.  wants  you  direct¬ 
ly.  I  be  sorry  doctor,  I  can’t  go  with  you.  ( doctor  leaves  ivindow)  It  bites — he’ll  go  ! 
Ho,  ha,  ha  1  Miles’ boy.  (exit  r.  1  e. 

Enter  Dr.  Coates  from  house ,  R.  2  e. 

Doc.  I’ll  go  immediately  *  Bless  me!  All  the  village  is  ill — a  rare  time  for  me  this— 
Ihave  so  much  tc  do,  I  don’t  know  which  way  to  go  first.  By-the-by,  I  have  not  paid 
my  respects  to  Mrs.  Fidget  yet,  confound  that  son  of  mine,  here  I  am  paying  my  ad¬ 
dresses  to  the  mother,  and  the  young  rascal  is  making  love  m  the  daughtei.  Death  and 
the  devil !  I  am  thinking  of  my  domestic  troubles,  while  some  of  my  patients  are  dy¬ 
ing.  I’ll  be  off  to  the  farmer’s,  (going  n.  Paddy  enters  from  ‘Pig  and  Whistle'  L.  3  e. 
runs  against  him.)  Can’t  you  look  where  you  are  going  ?  *  (exit  n.  1  e. 

Pad.  Bad  luck  to  ye!  Can’t  you  see  yourself  ?  Ho,  there !  come  back  ;  you  have 
eft  something  behind  you. 

Enter  Doctor,  L.  1  e. 

Doc.  What  have  I  left  behind  me  ? 

Pad.  Your  manners,  you  spalpeen. 

Doc.  Go  to  the  devil,  you  young  scoundrel.  (exit  l.  1  e. 

Pad ,  Ha,  ha,  ha  1  Go  to  the  divil  yourself,  and  niver  come  back  again.  '  Scoundrel 
did  he  call  me?  I’m  a  better  man  than  ever  he  was,  Mr.  Paddy  Miies — Oh,  it’s  Paddy 
O’Connery  I  mane.  Och,  murder  !  If  that  ould  fellow  should  be  the  chap  I  am  going 
to  make  my  master — I’m  blov  n  up,  sunk’  and  done  over.  I  wonder  what  my  young 
master  wants  me  to  kape  a  secret  from  his  father,  and  tell  a  lie  to  his  mother  for?  I 
have  it — he  is  going  caterwauling  after  the  girls ;  I  am  the  one  for  him — suremyouid 
father  always  tould  me  I  was  a  divil  of  a  boy  for  a  job  in  the  dark.  (sings 

Enter  Harry ,  from  Doctor's  shop ,  R.  2  E. 

Har.  Paddy,  you  seem  in  a  merry  humor. 

Pad.  How  can  I  be  otherwise  when  engaged  by  a  gintleman  like  yourself  ?  As 
aisy  as  you  could  say  ‘whack/  I  could  jump  through  a  brick  wall. 

Har.  The  devil  you  could  !  But  I  have  better  sport  in  view.  My  father  is  paying 
his  addresses  to  Mrs.  Fidget,  who  lives  in  yonder  house,  and  1  have  formed  an  attach¬ 
ment  for  her  daughter,  and  the  old  folks  have  arranged  matters  so  I  can’t  get  into  the 
house.  I  have  no  chance  of  seeing  my  dear  Jane — and  the  gardener,  Job,  is  as  spibtful 
to  me  as  his  mistress. 


PADDY  MILES’  BOY.  5 

Pad.  Spiteful  is  he  to  you  ?  Show  him  to  me.  my  darlin.  I’ll  knock  daylight 
through  him. 

Har.  No,  no,  my  dear  fellow,  that  won’t  do — strategem  is  the  order  of  the  day.  I 
intend  to  mix  a  bottle  of  medicine  by  which  meaus  you  can  gaiu  admittance  to  the 
house  and  give  this  letter  to  Jane  unnoticed.  (g  ives  letlet 

Pad.  I’ll  do  it  sir.  Get  me  the  physic,  and  show  me  the  door,  and  then  I’ll  find 
the  house  myself. 

liar.  I’ll  get  it  instantly.  (Exitinto  shop,  r.  2e. 

Pad.  Niver  fear  but  I’ll  get  the  blind  side  of  them— pitch  the  blarney  to  the  ould 
woman  and  gardener — he  don’t  know  what  a  boy  I  am  for  the  girls.  O,  murder  1  how 
they  used  to  fight  for  me  at  Limeiick,  when  Judy  went  up  like  a  sheaf  of  straw,  and 
Kitty  went  down  li^e  a  sack  of  sand. 

Reenter  Harry,  with  bottle ,  R.  2  E. 

Har.  Here  is  the  medicine,  Paddy  ,  pray,  be  careful. 

Pad.  Niver  fear,  sir  ;  I’ll  just  be  understanding  the  thing  right — the  physic  is  foi 
the  young  girl,  and  the  letter  for  the  ould  woman  ? 

Har.  No,  no!  the  letter  is  for  tlie  young  lady. 

Pad.  Very  well,  sir,— all  right,  sir,— you’re  down  upon  that  ould  woman,  sir.  I’ll 
do  it.  (Hairy  exits,  R.  2  E.) 

(Paddy  goes  to  the  garden  gate,  in  c.,  and  knocks  loud.  Is  nobody  at  home?  Job  opens 
the  gate,  o.  Paddy  strikes  him — he  runs  down,  l.) 

Job.  (l.)  O,  you  have  nearly  knocked  the  breath  out  of  me. 

Pad.  (r.)  Niver  mind,  I’ll' knock  it  in  again.  I’m  the  doctor,  and  want  to  go  in¬ 
to  the  house ! 

Job  You  the  doctor,  indeed  !  come,  that’s  a  good  pne. 

Pad •  Bad  luck  to  ye,  ain’t  I  the  doctor’s  boy,  wid  the  physic? 

Job.  That’s  more  likely,  but  I  can’t  let  you  in. 

Pad.  But  I  must  go  in  ;  my  master  tould  me  to. 

Job.  What,  Dr.  Coates?  I  wou’t  believe  it;  besides,  there  is  arrangements  made, 
between  my  mistress  and  your  master,  that  no  one  shall  enter. 

Pad.  Well,  don’t  I  know  that  ?  He  has  altered  his  mind,  bekase  I  am  his  confiden¬ 
tial  servanl,  and  it  is  good  news  I  have  to  tell  you,  my  darling! 

Job.  Good  news  to  tell  me!  What  is  it  ? 

Pad.  O,  be  aisy  a  while  ;  it’s  the  best  thing  you  iver  heard  of  in  all  your  life — youi 
grandfather’s  dead  ! 

Job.  Why,  my  grandfather!  Mr.  Lumpkins,  the  grocer! 

Pad.  (Aside,  laughing.)  That’s  his  name,  sure  enough  ! 

Job.  (Sings  and  dances.)  Here’s  luck  for  a  gardner  !  what,  I’ll  come  out  a  swell  next 
week  ;  but,  I  say,  measter,  who  told  you  so? 

Pad.  Who  tould  me  so?  I  on  my  soul,  it  was  Paddy  Miles’  boy! 

Job.  Jolly  good  luck  to  Paddy  Miles’  boy.  There,  you  may  go  into  the  house.  I’ll 
be  off  to  get  my  two  hundred  pounds.  (Exit,  singing  and  dancing,  L.  1  k.) 

Pad.  (Calling.)  Sec  here  !  come  back,  mister ! 

Reenter  Job,  L.  1  E. 

If  you  get  the  two  hundred  pounds,  you’ll  give  me  a  shilling. 

job.  Yes,  to  be  sure  I  will !  (Exit,  l.  1  E.) 

Pad.  I’m  mighty  sure  that  I  wou’t  get  that  shilling  anyhow.  He’s  into  the  secret 
with  Paddy  Miles’  boy,  and  I’ll  be  into  Lhe  house.  Who’s  afraid  !  Ould  Iielaad  for< 

Iver— vvhoo  !  (Exit  through  garden  gate,  in  C.) 


SCENE  SECOND.  —  A  parlor  in  Mrs.  Fidget's  house,  1  a. 

Eider  Mrs.  Fidget  and  Jane,  R.  1  E. 

Mrs.  F.  Don’t  talk  to  me,  miss. 

Jane.  Indeed,  it’s  a  great  shame,  that  a  young  girl  like  me  should  be  kept  a  com 
plete  prisoner, — no  one  must  come  in  or  go  out. 

Mrs.  F.  It’s  all  for  your  own  good.  You  don’t  know  the  deceit  of  this  world,  as  I  do 
There  is  not  a  gentleman  in  the  village  that  I  would  trust,  except  Dr.  Coates — he  is  i 
moral  mau  of  honor. 

Jane.  So  is  his  son,  Harry,  a  man  of  honor! 

Mrs.  F.  It’s  false  1  lie  is  a  scapegrace,  aud  no  more  like  his  father,  than  an  apple  it 
(lean  oyster. 

Jane.  Really  at  your  time  of  life,  to  think  of  marriage,  it  is  complete  folly. 

Mrs.  F  Why,  you  brazen-faced— I  will  have  you  locked  up  in  your  room.  [Calling. 
Mary!  Thomas!  Job!  Isay. 

Rad,  [ without .]  I’ll  be  wid  you,  my  darling  !  [Runs  out  l.  1  E.,  and  returns.] 

Mrs.  F.  P»less  us,  aud  save  us  1  where  did  you  spring  from  ? 

Pail.  Spring  from  1  Ould  Lrelaand,  to  be  sure. 

Mrs  F.  How  did  you  get  into  this  house? 

Pad.  Why,  through  the  gate,  and  through  the  door-  [gives  letter  to  Jane  unnoticed 


PADDY  MILES’  BOY, 


Mrs  F,  But  how  did  you  come? 

Pad.  On  the  marrow-bone  stage  of  my  ten  toes. 

Mrs  F.  What  do  you  want  ? 

Pad'  Nothing,  ma’am — I  brought  it  myself. 

Mrs  F.  I  shall  go  mad  if  I  talk  to  this  blockhead.  Jane,  call  the  servant. 

Jane.  La,  ma  !  he  must  have  come  for  something — perhaps  from  Dr.  Coates. 

Pad.  To  be  sure  1  have.  Here  is  a  bottle  of  physic  for  the  ould  woman. 

Mrs  F.  Why  did  you  not  say  so  at  first  ? 

Pad.  Because  you  niver  axed  me. 

Jane.  Don’t  be  angry  with  him  ;  he  has  just  come  from  Ireland,  and  he  is  not  used 
to  our  ways. 

Pad.  Yes,  ma’am,  I  came  all  the  way  from  Limerick,  with  my  own  illegant  self, 
Mr.  Paddy  O’Connery. 

Mrs  F.  As  that  is  the  case,  I  must  forgive  you— but  how  much  of  this  medicine  did 
your  master  say  I  must  take  at  a  time  ? 

Pad.  At  a  time,  ma’am, — (Aside)  O,  murder,  what  will  I  say  to  her?  He  said, 
ma’am,  that  you  must — (aside)  bad  luck  to  me  if  I  know  what  he  said. 

Mrs.  F.  I  wish  to  know  how  to  take  it 

Pad.  Yes,  ma’am— all  right  ma’am. 

Mrs.  F.  You  don’t  unierstand  me;  I  meau  the  quantity. 

Pad.  Yes,  ma’am — that’s  what  he  said,  ma’am  ! 

Mrs  F.  Why,  you’re  a  fool ! 

Pad.  All  right,  ma’am — yes,  ma’am  ! 

Mrs  F.  How  can  you  be  so  stupid  ;  I  meau  how  much  am  I  to  take  at  a  time  ? 

Pad.  Take  it  all  at  once,  ma’am  ! 

Mrs  F.  What !  take  a  quart  of  medicine  at  once  ? 

Jane.  He  means  you  should  take  a  wineglassful  at  a  time. 

Pad.  That’s  just  what  I  mane — take  a  glass  full  every  minute — then  you  will  f»el 
fnnnyand  frisky — take  i very  drop,  and  after  suck  the  cork. 

Mrs  F.  Feel  funny  and  frisky — take  glass  full  every  minute — I  must  be  dreadful  bad. 

Pad.  Yes,  ma’am,  you  are  very  bad,  my  master  tould  me  so ! 

Mrs  F.  My  dear  child,  support  me  to  my  room  ;  I  am  very  ill.  O.  Mr.  Connery, 
pray  run  for  your  master— the  dear  man  knows  my  constitution  so  well  ! 

Exit,  leaning  on  Jane,  n.  1  e. 

Pad.  (looking  after  them)  Yes,  ma’am,  you’ve  got  the  tic-del- er-ues— ha,  ha,  ha! 
The  ould  woman  is  quite  bad  bekase  I  brought  her  the  physic.  The  young  lady  ieels 
quite  well  ,bekase  I  brought  her  the  letter.  So  help  my  trotters,  if*  the  ould  woman 
takes  all  that  physic,  she’ll  be  after  having  the  colly- wabbles,  and  it’s  all  through  Paddy 
Miles’ boy.  Somebody’s  coming  ;  I’ll  hide  myself.  (retires  ii. 

Enter  Dr.  Coates,  in  a  passion,  l.  1  e. 

Doc.  Death  and  the  devil '  I  am  in  a  galloping  cosumption— sent  six  miles  and  a 
half,  and  all  through  that  Miles’ boy  !  Confound  him  !  (Paddy  runs  ff,  l.)  if  I  had 
him  here  I’d  break  every  bone  in  his  body!  What’s  to  do  in  the  house — I  don’t  see 
any  one  ;  I’ve  walked  hrlf  over— can’t  hear  any  one.  O,  that  Miles’  boy  ! 

Enter  Jane,  R.  1  e. 

Jane.  Good  morning,  Doctor  ;  how  is  Mr.  Henry? 

Doc.  Don’t  name  him  !  I  have  had  a  trick  played  upon  me  ! 

Jane.  Indeed  !  Who  has  dared  to  take  such  liberties  with  you  sir,  ? 

Doc.  A  rascal  called  Miles’  boy  !  A  man  came  to  me  and  said  that  Farmer  Saddle¬ 
tree  was  dying  ,  away  I  went,  post-haste  ;  when  I  got  there  he  was  smoking  his  pipe  ! 
“Are  vo*u  not  ill?”  said  I ,  ‘'Never  was  better  in  all  my  life,”  said  he.  I  began  to  curse 
Miles’  boy  ;  I  thought  of  having  a  good  patient— my  spirits  drooped,  like-  a  lump  of  su¬ 
gar  to  the  bottom  of  a  tea  cup  ;  but  where  is  your  ma  ?  I  want  to  see  her  on  particular 
business. 

Jane.  You  can’t  see  her  ;  she  has  had  a  dreadful  fright. 

Doc.  Who  has  frightened  her  ? 

Jane.  Miles’  boy. 

Doc.  (in  a  passion)  Curse  Miles’  boy  !  If  I  had  hold  of  him  I’d  break  his  infernal 
neck ! 

Enter  Mrs.  Fidget,  R.  1  e. 

Mrs  F.  My  dear  Doctor,  what  has  ruffled  you  so  ? 

Doc.  The  same'  thing  that  has  frightened  you — Miles’  boy. 

Mrs  F.  Why,  Dr.  Coates,  it’s  yourself  that  scared  me!  sending  your  boy  here  with 
such  a  horrid  lot  of  medicine— ordering  me  to  take  a  wineglassful  every  minute. 

Doc.  I  sent  a  boy  here  with  medicine  !  My  dear  lady  I  have  no  boy  at  present.  I 
desired  my  son  to  engage  one,  but  I  know  who  it  Is— that  confounded  Miles’  boy  has 
been  here.  Of  course,  you  have  not  taken  it  ? 

Mrs  F.  Yes,  I  have  nearly  taken  it  all ! 

Doc.  Mercy  on  me  !  It  maybe  poison  for  what  I  know!  Let  me  see  it  my  dear 
Mrs  Fidget! 


PADDY  MILES’  BOY. 


1 


Mrs  F.  Run,  Jane,  and  bring  the  bottle  to  show  the  doctor,  {exit  Jane  R.  1  E.)  O,  my 
dear  doctor,  I  shall  die,  I  know  I  shall.  O,  that  cruel  Mvles’  buy  j  ( both  run  about 

Doc,  To  play  suoh  a  trick  on  a  lady  !  the  scoundrel  !  the  monster  1  (strilces  stage 

Mrs  F.  He  ought  to  be  sent  to  prison  ! 

Doc.  I’ll  send  him  to  the  devil  ! 

Reenter  Jane,  vnthbottte,  R.  H.  1  E. 

Let  me  have  it !  {takes  bottle,  smells  and  tastes)  Jalap  and  salts!  {smells  and  tastes  again) 
No,  no,  it  ain’t !  ic’sonly  your  favorite  drink— gin  and  molasses.  O,  the  villain !  I’ll 
have  him  if  he’s  above  ground — bills  shall  be  printed  and  sent  all  over  the  country,  so 
that  everybody  shall  know  that  serpent— Miles’boy  ! 

Enter  Job,  fighting  himself,  L.  II.  1  E. 

Mrs  F.  How  dare  you  go  from  the  h'ouse  and  let  that  Miles’  boy  in  ? 

Job.  What— Miles’ boy  here?  I  wish  1  could  only  get  hold  of  him,  that’s  all !  Sent 
me  to  the  village  bank— said  my  grandfather  was  dead  and  left  me  twohundred  pounds 
—so  I  made  up  my  mind  to  marry  my  dear  Mary  Jane  ;  when  I  got  there  they  laughed 
at  me  and  said  I  was  to  go  and  make  a  fool  of  somebody  else,»and  say  it  was  Miles’  boy. 

Doc  The  rascal  has  been  here  and  played  a  pretty  trick  on  me  and  Mrs  Fidget ! 

Mrs  F.  He  has,  indeed  !  on  that  account  l  forgive  you  this  time  ;  but  if  ever  you  let 
anyonein  the  houseagain  withoutmy  knowledge,  I’ll  send  you  about  your  business ! 
Come,  my  dear  doctor,  a  glass  of  v  ine  will  revive  your  spirits. 

Doe.  True,  my  dear  Mrs.  Fidget!  my  nerves  are  sadly  out  of  order,  and  I  have 
something  of  great  importance  to  communicate,  {sternly)  Job,  remember  Miles’ boy  1 

{Exit  with  Mrs  Fidget,  K.  1  E. 

Job.  {sparring)  Remember  Miles’  boy  !  can  I  forget  him  ? 

Jane.  Don’t  look  so  angry,  Job— you  are  not  the  only  one  that  has  hid  a  tnck  play¬ 
ed  on  them  by  Miles’  boy.  Let  me  go  to  the  garden  gate  with  you  ? 

Job.  No,  I  won’t  ! 

Jane.  Do— there’s  a  good  Job  ! 

Job.  I  won't !  so  take  no  for  an  answer. 

Jane.  You’re  a  cross,  ill-natured,  good-for-nothing  fellow  !  I  hate  you,  that  I  do! 
and  I  wish  that  Miles’  bov  had  sent  you  twice  as  far !  {exit  h.  1.  e. 

Job.  No  doubt  of  it,  then  you  could  go  running  about  wherever  you  like,  {starting) 
Blow  me  if  I  don’t  think  thatthe  fellow  I  let  in,  that  said  he  came  from  Dr.  Coates,  was 
Miles’boy,  I’ll  go  and  watch  for  him,  and  if  1  catch  him,  I’ll  make  Miles’ boy  wish 
himself  miles  oil'.  (exit  it.  1  E 


Scene  III.— Same  as  first. 

Enter  Padey  from  gate,  c. 

Pad.  By  getting  behind  the  water  spout,  the  divil  of  a  sowl  seen  me,  that  wasn’t 
there  ;  it’s  lucky  for  me  that  I’ve  changed  my  name,  for  I’m  getting  into  t.hedivil’s  own 
job  here,  as  I  have  at  ail  the  other  places.  That  was  the  ould  top  that  I  seen  into  the 
house;  somebody  sent  him  to  the  divil  and  back  again,  and  tould  him  it  was  Paddy 
Miles’  boy  ;  that  poor  devil  of  a  gardener  won’t  be  at  all  pleased  with  the  two  hundred 
pounds  he’ll  get  over  the  left.  Upon  my  sowl,  this  is  a  strange  family— here  is  the  onld 
top  in  love  wid  de  ould  woman,  and  the  young  top  in  love  wid  the  ould  woman’s  daugh¬ 
ter,— there’ll  be  the  divil  to  pay,  and  no  pitch  hot  ;  anl  it  strikes  me  foicibly  that  Mr. 
Harry  wants  to  bolt  the  moon  wid  Miss  Jane,  and  i  wouldn’t  be  at  all  surprised  if  he’d 
lave  a  letter  behind  and  say  it  was  Miles’  boy. 

Enter  Harry  from  shoj>;  r.  2  E. 

liar.  'Well,  Faddy,  my  good  fellow,  I  have  another  job  for  you  ;  a  distant  relation  of 
mine  has  died  and  left  me  five  thousand  pounds,  and  my  father  one  shilling— they 
quarreled  some  time  ago,  which  caused  the  turn  in  my  favor— now  you  manage  to  get 
Jane  out  of  the  house,  and  twenty  pounds  shall  be  your  reward. 

Pad.  I’ll  do  it,  my  darling;  did  you  say  twenty  pounds?  Sure  I’ll  do  it  for  twice 
as  much — only  give  me  ashillelah,  and  I’ll  down  wid  the  house 

Har.  No,  no,  Paddy,  force  won’t  do.  I  am  going  to  try  a  stratagem— I  have  a  female 
dress — I’ll  go  and  fetch  it.  (exit  into  shop 

Pad.  Am  I  aslapeor  awake  ?  He’s  going  to  make  a  woman  of  me,  Paddy  Miles’  boy 
—I’m  sure  to  get  out  of  the  frying  pan  into  the  fire. 

Reenter  Harry,  with  dress. 

Har.  Now  here  is  the  dress,  Paddy  ! 

Pad.  O,  botheration,  man  1  I  can’t  be  a  woman,  sure— my  father  never  intended 
me  for  one  ! 

Har.  But,  my  dearfelllow,  consider  the  twenty  pounds. 


PADDY  MILES’  BOY. 


Pad.  O,  be  >vlsy.  Sure  you  know  that  money  stops  a  bigger  man’s  mouth  than  Pad¬ 
dy  Miles’  boy.  (puts  on  dress)  I’m  off  before  you  can  clap  salt  on  me  tail — whoo  ! — my 
name  is  Judy  O’Flaherty. 

Mar.  ( gives  letter)  Stop,  and  I’ll  give  you  an  idea  how  to  walk  like  a  young  lady. 
Paddy  walks  after  him  very  awkwardly — business  with  walking  until  Harry  goes  off  r.  2  E. 
Paddy  exits  through  garden  gate ,  c. 


Scene  IY. — Mrs.  Fidget's  parlor,  1  a. 

Enter  Dr.  Coates  and  Mrs.  Fidget  h.Ie, 

Doc.  Enough,  my  dear  Mrs.  Fidget  ;  to-morrow’s  sun  shall  make  you  Mrs.  Doctor 
Coates.  I’ll  order  a  band  of  music,  in  fact,  make  every  airangement  before  I  sleep  to¬ 
night.  My  son,  Harry,  l'il  tend  to  London,  to  prevent  any  trouble  with  him. 

Mrs.  F.  And  T'll  se  d  Jane  to  her  aunt’s,  so  we  shant  be  bothered  with  her. 

Doc.  To-morrow  will  be  the  happiest  day  of  n  y  life— and  we  m  ill  have  a  nun  day  of 
it.  I’ll  dance  and  sing - 

Fn  '<  r  Jane  L  1  e, 

jane.  O,  my,  theie’s  Mob  and  a  woman  fighting  in  the  garden — she  says  she  comes 
here  for  a  situation,  and  will  come  in. 

Mrs.  F.  I  want  no  servants.  Who  sent  lnr,  I  should  like  to  know  ? 

Jane.  Miles’  boy. 

Doc.  Curse  Miles’ boy !  that  villain  will  be  the  death  of  me.  (noise  n. — looks  off— a 
crash)  0,  dear,  they  are  fighting  on  the  stair  ;  should  they  fall  it  break  both  their  necks. 

Pad.  ( without )  Bad  luck  to  you!  let  go  your  hould 

Job.  ( without )  Murder,  murder  !  ’  {crash,  noise  of  falling  down  stairs,  L. 

Doc.  By  the  Lord  Harry,  she  has  knocked  Job  down  stairs. 

j 

Enter  Paddy  l.Ie.  disguised  with  woman  s  dress. 

Pad.  Long  life  to  you  !  may  you  niver  die  ragged.  You’re  the  ould  woman  I’m  go¬ 
ing  to  make  me  mistress. 

Mrs.  F.  My  good  woman,  there  ¥  no  servants  wanted  here. 

Pad.  Now  don’t  be  tellihg  any  lies  ;  I  know  you  do.  Paddy  Miles’  boy  lold  me  so — 
faith,  he’s  a  countryman  of  mine,  and  wouldn’t  be  after  playing  any  tricks  on  a  poor 
ouJo  woman  like  me.  (gives  letter  to  Jane,  unnoticed.  ~  Exit  Jane  L.  1  e. 

hoc.  (aside)  Yery  lady-like,  upon  my  word.  That  Miles’  boy  plays  tricks  upon  every 
body — myself — and  this  lady  ;  ind  el,  I  may  say  the  whole  country  round  is  suffering 
through  his  mischief. 

Mrs  F.  Indeed,  doctor,  you  might  say  the  whole  world.  We  are  very  sorry  for  you, 
but  we  want  no  servant. 

Pad.  I  won’t  belave  It,  you  ould  catermollin  ;  nor  I  won’t  belave  you,  old  cadger, 
nather— and  I’ll  break  your  nose,  if  you  tell  me  so  again. 

Doc.  (aside)  Confound  that  Miles’  boy,  for  sending  such  a  woman  here. 

Enter  Job  l.  1  e.  Pcd  lyjstrikes  him  as  he  enters — his  nose  bleeds, 

Job.  Oh,  my  nose  !  ( bleeding ,  runs  to  r. 

Pad.  Divil  fly  away  wid  thereof  of  your  nose.  You  didn’t  behave  like  a  man  should 
to  a  woman. 

Doc.  My  good  woman,  don’t  talk  so.  Miles’  boy  playing  a  trick  on  you,  is  no  fault 
of  ours.  Here’s  a  shilling— now  leave  the  house.  '  "  *  (gives  money 

Pad.  Jolly  good  luck  to  you,  ould  tin  pot.  You’re  a  trump.  Stop  till  1  get  hould 
of  the  vagabone— I’ll  pitch  into  him  like  a  hot  dinner.  I’ll  just  show  you  how  I’ll  put 
it  into  him  right  and  left.  (sparring  at  doctor 

Doc.  No,  thank  you.  I’d  rather  be  excused. 

Job.  That’s  all  sue  thinks  about.  Oh,  my  nose! 

Pad.  I’ll  give  you  a  toper  for  luck,  my  darling. 

Mrs  F.  Goodness  gracious!  I  am  quite  shocked.  Put  it  into  Dr.  Coates  right  and 
left,  and  give  Job  a  toper  for  luck.  You  are  a  disgrace  to  your  sex— leave  the  house,  or 
Job  shall  put  you  out. 

Job  No,  not  me — get  somebody  else. 

Pad.  It’s  to  me  your  spaking?  Job  put  mo  out !  I’d  beat  dozen  like  him  ;  and  as 
you  my  ould  tabby,  if  you  were  not  a  woman  I’d  give  ye  jist  such  a  lift  as  Molly  did  the 
cat. 

Doc.  Come,  come;  this  is  too  baL  I’ll  put  up  with  it  no  longer.  I’ll  send  for  a  con¬ 
stable  and  have  you  put  in  the  lockup— see  what  a  magistrate  would  say  to  such  conduct. . 

Pad.  I’ll  save  you  the  trouble ;  but  I’ll  have  a  slap  at  Mister  Job  before  I  go. 

Job.  No,  you  don’t. 

Pad.  Stop  till  I  put  this  money  in  me  pocket. 

Lifts  up  dress  to  put  away  money ,  and  his  man's  dress  is  diccovcred. 

Omnes.  It’s  a  man  !  It’s  a  man  ! 

Pad.  Och,  murther  !  What  will  I  do  ?  I’ll  give  ’em  leg  bail.  (Puns off  l.  1  e. 

Job.  I’ll  swear  that’s  Mile’s  boy. 


PADDY  MILES’  BOY. 


Doc.  No  doubt  of  it.  Come,  Mrs.  Fidget,  we’ll  raise  the  neighbors  and  have  the 
scamp  put  in  the  stocks, — follow  us  Job.  {Exit  Dr.  and  Mrs,  Fidget,  l.  1  e. 

ob.  It’s  all  very  well  to  say  follow  us,  Job.  I  think  I’ve  had  enough  of  Miles  boy  a 
physic,  which  my  nose  can  testify.  I  shan’t  be  in  a  hurry  to  get  another  dig  from  him. 

Noise  of  dogs  barking  at  back.  Ft  it  Job,  l.  1  E. 


I  know  him  by  liia 


Scene  V. — Same  as  first— Noise  of  dogs  continued. 

Enter  Paddy  from  gate  in  c. 

Pad.  {undressing  himself  quickly)  I  forgot  that  I  was  a  woman  ;  however,  they  are 
coming,  and  I  must  face  it  out. 

Enter  Dr.  Coates,  Mrs.  Fidget  and  Job  from  gale,  c. 

Doc.  Young  man,  have  you  seen  a  woman  running  this  way  ? 

Mrs.  F.  A  man  dressed  in  woman’s  clothes  ! 

Pad.  Faith,  I  did  It  was  that  dirty  blackguard.  Miles’  boy. 

Job.  Don’t  mind  him,  what  he  says  ;  he  is  Miles’  boy  himself, 
turn-up  nose.  .  ,  .  ... 

Pad.  Know  me  by  my  turn-up  nose  !  I’ll  give  it  to  you,  me  darling.  {runs  at  him. 

Enter  Reuben,  R.  1  E. 

Reu.  Ah,  Mr.  Paddy,  you’ve  been  going  it  again  ! 

Doc.  You  know  him,  then  ? 

Reu.  I  thought  evervbody  knew  Miles’  boy  ! 

Doc.  Miles’  boy  !  Curse  me,  if  I  havn’t  got  you  now. 

Pad.  Och,  murther  !  it’s  all  a  mistake. 

Doc.  I’ll  mistake  you  !  ( calling )  Harry,  Harry,  I  say  ! 

Reu.  Your  son  Harry,  doctor,  has  just  been  married  to  a  Miss  Fidget,  at  yonder 
church. 

Doc.  My  son  married  ?  It’s  false. 

Fad,  By  me  sowl,  it  s  true  enough,  for  here  they  come. 

Enter  Harry  and  Jane ,  R.  1  E. 

Har.  and  Jane.  ( kneeling )  W  e  crave  your  blessing. 

Doc.  The  devil !  This  is  worse  than  being  played  a  trick  upon  by  Miles’  boy. 

Pad.  You  may  well  say  that.  Mr.  Harry  has  got  a  wife  and  five  thousand  pounds— 
fou  have  a  shilling  and  no  wife.  Paday  Miles  don’t  care  a  dump  for  you, 

Doc.  Here’s  a  pretty  go  ;  but  what’s  done  can’t  be  undone. 

Mrs.  F.  True,  doctor  ;  and  as  Harry  has  five  thousand  pounds,  I  think  we  had  bet¬ 
ter  forgive  them.  ... 

Doc.  I  think  so  too.  There,  bless  you  both,  and  may  you  be  happv  ;  and  as  tor  you, 
Mr.  Paddy _  {Harry  and  Jane  rise. 

Har.  Pray,  forgive  him,  father;  you  know  the  old  one  is  not  so  black  as  he  is  paint¬ 
ed. 

Jane.  And  lie’s  a  clever  post-man. 

Doc.  Well,  the  odds  are  against  me.  I  suppose  I  must  forgive— but  no  more  right  and 
left. 

Pad.  Niver  fear,  sir ,  only  pardon  me  this  time  and  I’ll  nivtr  do  so  agin. 

Har.  Paddy  shall  remain  in  our  service,  and  we  will  be  as  happy  as  the  days  are 

l01patZ.  By  me  sowl,  you’ve  had  it  all  your  own  way,  {to  audience)  But  I  am  sure 
there’s  one  thing  wanted  to  make  us  all  happy;  and  with  your  kind  permission.  I’ll 
solicit  our  friends  here  to  bestow  their  blessing  upon  Paddy  Miles,  the  Limerick  boy 


Jane. 

Reuben. 


Harry. 


Paddy. 


Mrs.  Fidget. 


Dr  Coates. 


Job. 


CURTAIN. 


j 


&-NEW  PLAYS.fe#^ 


Fifteen  Cents  Facli  Unless  Otherwise  Marked. 


Around  the  Horn. 

A  Farce-Comedy  in  4  acts.  4  male,  2  female  characters 
An  ocean  trip  from  San  Francisco  to  New  York 
causes  an  immense  amount  of  fun. 

- - x — - 

COST  TIMES— MODERN. 


TIME  OF  FLAYING— TWO  HOURS. 


■x- 


SYNOPSIS. 

ACT  I.— Scene  1st.  Cabin  of  the  ocean  steamer  Mary  Jane— Passengers  coming  on 
board — Peter  and  Peleg  meet — Isabel  and  Captain— Peleg  and  his  Billow — a  patent  pin¬ 
cushion— Isabel’s  trouble — “’Let’s  be  gay  and  happy  still”— Peter  gives  his  first  ex¬ 
perience  on  board  of  a  ship— “I  never  vas  so  sick  in  mine  life” — Kate,  Isabel  and 
the  Captain — Peleg  and  Kate — Peleg  kisses  the  cook— how  she  accepted  his  advances 
— “Mine  Got  in  Ilimmel,  I  finds  me  somedings  in  mine  room” — Hanibal,  the  darkey 
—a  general  ruption— “Hi  gollyl  see  ’em.” 

ACT  II. — Scene  1st,  Isabel  and  the  Captain— Peleg  afraid  he  is  in  the  way — it 
reminds  him  of  the  time  he  went  sparking  Sail— Kate  and  Peleg— Hanibal  comes  in- 
disgust  of  Peleg— “’dere  nefer  was  a  posey  flowermitoudt  stickers”-Pelcg  and  Peter  sea 
sick— Hanibal  interrupts  love  scene  between  Peleg  and  Kate. 

ACT  III.— Scene  1st.  Hanibal  and  Peter—' “Oh!  father,  you  signed  my  death  war¬ 
rant  when  you  signed  your  will” — Peter  relates  his  courting  experience — Peleg  in  love— 
Peter’s  advice  to  the  Captain— Peleg  jealous  of  Peter. 

ACT  IV. — Isabel  tells  the  Captain  the  conditions  of  her  father’s  will— The  Cap¬ 
tain’s  declaration— “I  must  obey  my  father!”— The  quarrel  between  Peter  and  Peleg, 
in  which  Hanibal  appears— “Glory  mit  der  stars  und  stripes  and  the  American 
eagle— and  de  cullud  population”-Kate  and  the  Captain— Kate  tells  a  secret— Captain’s 
despair— Kate  endeavors  to  make  Peleg  propose,  in  which  she  succeeds  as  Hanibal  ap¬ 
pears— Peter’s  opinion  of  mudder-by-laws— Isabelle  tells  the  Captain  she  is  to  marry 
Peter  Polstine— Peter — “Dot  vas  me”— the  despair  of  Isabelle  when  she  discovers  who 
Peter  is— Peter  refuses  to  marry  Isabelle,  for  my  wife’s  name  will  be  Katrina— mine 
little  Shermany  gal— Isabelle  accepts  the  Captain— Kate  and  Peleg— matrimony— • 
double  wedding  when  the  Mary  Jane  reaches  port.  PRICE  25  CENTS. 


The  General  Manager; 

- - OR, - - 

A  Shot  From  the  Kitchen  Range. 

-jr 

A  Musical  Farce-Comedy  in  3  acts  by  Walter  J.  Echols . 
5  male ,  5  female  characters.  Time  2  hours. 
Costumes  Modern. 

Kitchen  at  Mr.  Swel son’s — Babette  and  Simon,  servants  of  Mr.  Swelson— arrival  of 
Steele,  Jack,  Sally  and  Polly,  servants  of  Mr.  Green  and  others — invitation  to  the  ball — 
servants  opinion  of  their  masters— Smon  can’t  stand  it  much  longer — Jack’s  version  of 
how  he  manages  Mr.  Green — “If  they  have  no  vices  make  them  one” — “Our  masters 
just  what  we  make  them” — Mr.  Swelson  and  Babette — Song,  “That  Little  Black  Mus¬ 
tache” — Catherine  in  love  with  her  music  teacher — Mrs.  Swelson  indignant — Babette, 
“there’s  trouble  in  the  air” — Mrs.  Swelson  refuses  Babette’s  request — “My  poor  sick 
aunt”— Mrs.  Swelson  need’s  of  $100— Mr,  Swelson  invites  Mr.  Green  to  dinner  to  intro¬ 
duce  him  to  Catharine — Simon — “Now  for  a  vice  for  master” — A  black-eyed  girl  at  the 
glove  store— Mr.  Swelson’s  nibbles  the  hook — “She’s  always  inquiring  about  you” — 
Swelson  delighted  and  is  on  the  hook  solid — “I’m  solid  for  the  ball  to-night” — Ila,  ha! 
they  can’t  resist  us  old  boys — Mrs.  Swelson’s  trouble — “I  can’t  ask  Mr.  Swelson  for  the 
money” — Babette  lends  Mrs.  Swel-on  the  money — “I  think  I  shall  go  to  the  ball.” 

ACT  II — Scene  1st.  Diningroom — Mr.  Wise  and  Catherine— Mrs.  Swelson  inter- 
uptsa  love  scene — Swelson  makes  a  confident  of  Simon,  in  which  the  pretty  girl  figures 
— Catharine’s  despair— the  bub-bub — bubbles  of  a  bursting  heart — Babette  airs  her 
opinions — Wise  and  Babette — Jack  furious— Servants  decide  Catherine  shall  marry 
Wise  and  not  Green — Babette’s  friends — the  dinner — Jack  locks  Green’s  clothes  up 
so  he  cannot  attend  dinner — Babette  gives  Green  away — “murdered  his  tailor!” — Swel¬ 
son’s  joy  that  Green  is  detained  at  home — We’ll  go  to  the  opera — Swelson  hides  in  the 
cupboard — discovered. 

ACT  III. — Servants  entertain  in  the  absence  of  Mr.  and  Mrs.  Swelson — Wise  is  the 
orchestra — quadrille — return  of  the  Swelson’s — Wise  by  mistake  in  Catherine’s  room — 
the  letter  discovered — Catherine’s  determination — entrance  of  Wise — Green  bankrupt — 
“Mr.  Wise  shall  marry  Catharine — I’ll  make  him” — Catherine’s  romance  happily  ended 
— Servant’s  forgiven — Mr.  Swelson’s  opinion  is  that  there  is  no  shot  like  a  hot  one  from 
the  kitchen  range,  when  fired  at  the  target  of  our  weaknesses.  Price  15  Cents 


Jacob  Shlafifs  Mistake. 

A  Farce  in  1  Act ,  by  J.  E.  Crary,  for  3  male  and  2 
female  characters.  A  capital  farce  with  a  good  Dutch 
character  in  it.  An  old  man ,  a  modern  dude,  a  fussy  old 
maid,  and  a  girl  of  the  period  make  up  the  rest  of  the  cast. 
Costumes  to  suit  characters.  Time  of  performance  20 
minutes.  Price  15  Cents. 


A  KISS  IN  THE  DARK. 

A  Farce  in  1  Act,  by  John  Baldwin  Buckstone,  for  2 
male  and  3  female  characters.  This  piece  is  immense  and 
will  make  a  good  after-piece.  Costumes  modern.  Time 
of  performance  1  hour .  Price  15  Cents . 


U*  OF  ILL  UB» 


GRANDMOTHER 
Hildebrand’s  Legacy. 


v 

A  Drama  in  5  Acts,  by  C.  A.  Lamson ,  for  11  male 
and  8  female  characters — doubles  in  cast  so  as  to  play 
ivith  5  males  and  4  females.  This  piece  is  just  the  thing 
for  amateurs.  Has  two  beautiful  tableaux .  Costumes 
modern.  Time  of  performance  two  hours. 

SYNOPSIS  OF  EVENTS. 

ACT  I. — A  Vermont  home.  The  birth-day  party.  Betsy  Ann 
“  flirts.”  Grandmother  Hildebrand’s  arrival.  “  Git  out.  you  sass- 
box !  ”  The  city  guest.  The  dance.  Grandmother  has  the  “crick” 
in  the  back.  i 

ACT  II. — A  mortgaged  home.  The  blind  father.  Family  prayers. 
Mae’s  resolution.  Appeal  for  her  lover.  “A  woman’s  honor  is 
her  life.”  Parting  between  Mrs.  Blosson  and  Mae. 

ACT  III. — New  York  street  scene.  Pat’s  breakfast.  Interview 
between  Mrs.  Pierson  and  Isabel.  Mrs.  Pierson  denies  her  own 
child.  The  new  housekeeper.  Her  meeting  with  George.  Pat 
watches  the  “Ould  Tabby.”  Mrs.  Landon’s  discovery.  Mrs.  Pier¬ 
son  as  a  “somnambulist.”  Her  secret.  “Mrs.  Jack  Crawford,  your 
sin  has  found  you  out.”  United  at  last.  Tableau — “The  Golden 
Chain.” 

ACT  IV.  The  return  home.  Mae’s  plan.  Isabel’s  return.  For¬ 
giveness.  Meeting  between  father  and  daughter.  The  scare.  “Who 
am  de  villan  ?  ”  Pat’s  stick  comes  down.  The  midnight  robber. 
Isabel’s  •  warning.  The  uplifted  dagger.  Jack  Thorne.  “Once 
more  I  will  save  her.”  Mrs.  Piersons  insanity  and  death. 

ACT  V. — Farmer  Blossom’s  farm.  Mae’s  return.  The  same  old 
hymn:  “Dennis.”  The  blind  see.  Sam  and ’Lindy  court.  “Bean 
porridgehot.”  Arrival  of  grandmother.  “Y'ou’ve  grow’d’mazingly.” 
The  dance.  Farmer  Blossom’s  invitation.  Tableau — “Love  rules 
the  world.”  Price  25  Cents. 


OUR  HOPEFUL  SON. 

A  Farce  in  1  Act ,  by  C.  F.  Ingraham,  for  3  male  and  £ 
female  characters.  A  capital  after-piece  which  goes 
well — every  part  funny.  Costumes  to  suit  characters . 
Time  in  playing,  15  minutes.  Price  15  Cents , 


Every  Amateur  wants  a  copy,  and  shout  J 

order  at  once. 


BY  A.  D.  AMES. 

A  book  of  useful  information  for  Amateurs  and  others,  written  ex¬ 
pressly  for  those  who  are  giving  public  entertainments  and 
who  wish  to  make  their  efforts  successful — containing 

much  information  never  before  given.  Mr.  Ames 
has  had  many  years  experience,  and  in 

this  work  gives  many  hints  which 
cannot  fail  to  be  of  great 
benefit  to  all. 


Do  you  wish  to  know  How  to  act  ? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  How  to  make  up? 

Do  you  wdsh  to  know  How  to  make  fuses? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  How  to  be  prompted  ? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  How  to  imitate  clouds? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  How  to  imitate  waves? 
Do  you  wish  to  know  How  to  make  thunder  ? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  flow  to  produce  snow  ? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  How  to  articulate? 

~Do  you  wish  to  know  How  to  make  lightning? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  How  to  produce  a  crash? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  How  to  make  a  wind-storm  ? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  How  to  be  successful  on  the  stage? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  The  etfects  of  the  drama  on  the  mind? 
Do  you  wish  to  know  How  to  assign  parts  successfully? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  The  duties  of  the  property  man  ? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  How  ot  arrange  music  for  plays? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  Many  hints  about  the  stage? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  How  to  form  a  dramatic  club9 
Do  you  wish  to  know  The  duty  of  the  prompter? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  How  to  conduct  rehearsals? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  The  best  method  for  studying? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  How  to  make  a  stage  laugh  ? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  How  to  burn  a  colored  fire? 
Do  you  wish  to  know  llow  to  make  a  rain  storm? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  A  short  history  of  the  drama? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  All  about  scene  painting? 

Do  you  wish  to  know  Maoready’s  method  for  acting? 

If  you  wish  to  know  the  above,  read  Hints  to  Amateurs,  it  will  be 
J  sent  you  for  15  cents  per  copy. 


« 


FOUND  AT  LAST ! 


A  Pocket  Speller, 
Dictionary,  and 
Memorandum 
Book  Combined. 


A  Concise  Description  of 

Thompson’s  Pocket  Speller. 

It  gives  the  right  orthography  of  all  words,  (over  22,800)  in  common  use,  and  in  near¬ 
ly  eveiy  instance  their  definition.  It  also  gives  the  right  orthography  of  the  given 
names  of  men  and  women,  rules  for  the  use  of  capitals  and  punctuation  marks, abbrevia- 
tions of  names  of  states  and  territories,  letters  of  introduction  and  recommendation,  - 
definition  of  commercial  terms,  forms  of  notes,  due  bills,  receipts,  letters  of  credit,  orders 
for  money,  merchandise  and  goods  stored,  principal  holidays,  marriage  anniversaries, 
combina1  ion  of  shades,  and  carefully  selected  laws  of  etiquette  in  social  and  business 
life,  also  a  silicate  slate  for  memorandums. 

The  Speller  is  bound  in  leather  and  indexed,  and  is  of  convenient  size  to  be  carried 
in  vest  pocket. 

Reasons  why  this  Speller  and  Dictionary  is  the  most  desirable 
book  of  its  kind,  and  some  of  the  many  advantages  it  has 
over  all  others. 

1.  It.  gives  the  most  complete  list  of  words  in  common  use. 

2.  It  is  a  Speller,  Dictionary,  handy  companion  and  memorandum  book  combined. 

3.  It  is  the  only  book  of  the  kind  that  can  be  conveniently  carried  in  the  vest  pocket 
being  the  regular  size  of  mmeorandum  books  made  for  that  purpose, 

4.  It  is  the  omy  book  of  its  kind  that  is,  indexed, 

5.  It  is  the  only  book  of  its  kind  that  prints  all  words  pronounced  alike  but  spelled 
differently,  so  they  can  be  distinguished  at  a  glance. 

6.  It  is  the  only  book  of  its  kind  that  gives  the  right  orthography  of  the  given  names 
of  men  and  women . 

7.  It  is  the  only  book  of  its  kind  that  show  where  the  letter  E  at  the  end  of  a  word 
is  to  be  dropped  when  adding  ed  or  ing. 

8.  It  is  the  only  book  of  its  kind  that  gives  a  complete  list  of  the  most  practical 
business  forms. 

9.  It  is  the  only  book  of  its  kind  that  gives  the  laws  of  etiquette  in  social  and  busi¬ 
ness  life;  these  rules  alone  are  worth  the  price  of  Speller. 

10.  This  Speller  is  bound  in  two  qualities  of  leather  and  its  price  brings  it  within  the 
reach  of  all,  being  50  cents,  bound  with  American  Russia  leather,  Gilt  edge  and  in¬ 
dexed.  Bound  with  imitation  Seal,  red  edge  and  not  indexed,  25  cents.  On  recoipt  of 
Post  Office  Order,  (for  quality  desired)  the  Speller  will  be  prepaid  to  any  address, 

Ames’  Publishing  Co., 

Lock  Box  152,  CLYDE,  OHIO. 


THEATRICAL 

-AND- 

Fancy  Costume  Wigs. 


Attention  is  called  to  tliis  last  of  WIGS,  BEARDS,  MUS¬ 
TACHES,  WHISKERS,  Ae. 

We  employ  a  Wig-maker  especially  to  manfuacture  goods  for 
our  trade,  and  can  guarantee  satisfaction.  All 
goods  made  under  our  personal  supervision. 

In  ordering  be  careful  to  state  every  particular,  t.  e.,  size,  color,  etc.  Any  wig  for 
special  character  or  occasion  can  be  made  to  order. 


White  Old  Man . $4  50 

Iron  Gray .  4  50 

Yankee . 4  50 

Irish .  4  50 

Crop,  (all  oolors) .  5  50 

Fright .  4  00 

Negro .  1  00 

Dress  Scalp,  with  parting . $5  00 

Scalps .  2  75 

Gentlemanly  Irish,  with  parting..—  5  00 

Bald  Wigs,  grey  or  white, .  4  50 

Rip  Van  Winkle . 4  50 

Grey  Dress  Wig,  with  parting, .  4  50 

White  “  “  “  “  .  4  50 

“  (white  old  man) .  1  50 

Clowns,  in  colors, .  4  50 

“  (gray  old  man) .  1  50 

[with  top  knot]- .  1  50 

‘‘  wench] . 5  00 

Sir  Peter  Teazle .  5  00 

Shylock . -  4  50 

Court  Wig  with  Bag .  4  50 

Court  wig  with  Tie .  4  50 

Paul  Pry . - . -  4  50 

Dundreary .  5  50 

Light  Dress  Wig,  with  parting, .  5  50 

Rough  Irishman . 4  00 

Plantaloon,  Wig  and  Beard, .  5  00 

Robinson  Crusoe .  4  50 

Monk .  4  00 

Box  and  Cox,  2  Wigs  ;  each  Wig . 3  50 

Chinaman,  with  Pigtail, .  5  00 

Dress  Wig.  superior . 5  00 

Red  and  Brown  bald  Wigs .  4  50 

— - ladies. — 

Court  Wig . $6  50 

Grand  Dutchess . 6  50 

Lady  Teazle .  7  00 

Flaxen  Country  Boy . 3  50 

Physician  or  Lnwyer— white .  5  00 

Dress  Wig  with  Eyebr’ws&Whisk'rs  5  50 

Dress,  without  parting .  4  00 

Duplex  ;  can  be  worn  either  as  male 
or  female  Wig  ;  very  convenient ; 

in  reality,  2  Wigs  in  one .  6  00 

Flow  Wigs,  long  hair,  suitable  for 
most  Shakesperian  characters. 

Fairy  Plays,  Ac . 5  50 

Comic  Old  Woman’s  From 

Marie  Antonette . r .  7  50 

Mother-in-Law . 5  50 

Female,  plain  long  hair,  so  that  lady 
can  do  up  as  she  wishes,  a  really 

fine  wig . 10  00 

Nigger  Crape  Masks,  a  sub  t  tute  for 

blacking  the  face .  2  00 

Ladies’  Wig,  blonds,  hgh  and  dark, 
brown  and  black,  made  up  in 

present  fashion .  6  00 

Piece . $2.50. 

BEARDS,  WHISKERS,  MUSTACHES,  Ac. 


Bide  Whiskers  &  Mustache  on  wire....$l  25 


Bide  Whiskers  and  Mustache  on 

wire,  superior .  1  50 

Side  Whiskers,  no  Mustache,  wire...  1  00 
Side  Whiskers  and  Mustache,  gauze  2  00 
Bide  Whiskers  and  Mustache,  on 

gauze,  superior, .  2  25 

Bide  Whiskers,  without  Mustache, 

on  gauze, . 1  50 

Bide  Whiskers,  without  Mustache 

>  on  gauze,  superior . 1  75 

Full  Beard .  1  75 

Full  Beard,  superior, .  2  00 


Full  Beard  without  Mustache . $1  50 

Full  Beard,  no  Mustache  superior...  1  75 
Mustache  and  Chin  Beard,  combined  2  00 

Imperials .  30 

Full  Chin  Beard . 1  25 

Mustaches  on  wire .  35 

“  gauze .  40 

CRAPE  HAIR  — Fob  making  False 
Whiskers,  Mustaches,  Ac. 

Colors:  Black,  White,  Light  Brown, 
Dark  Brown,  Iron-grey  and  Red. 
Price,  per  yard . . . 25 


THE  AMES  PUBLISHING  CO., 

.LOOK  BOX  168  -  CLYDE,  OHIO. 


ARTICLES  NEEDED  BY  AMATEURS. 


MAKE  YOUR  OWN  WIGS,  BEARDS,  MUSTACHES,  Etc. 
PREPARED  WOOL  IN  ALL  COLORS.  Per  oz.,  50c. 


TABLEAUX  LIGHTS.  Our  Tableaux  Lights  are  very  easily  used  and  are  of 
the  best  manufacture.  Plainest  directions  accompany  each.  \Ve  have  the  following 
colors:  Red,  Green,  Blue,  and  White.  Price  each,  25  cents. 

COLORED  FIRE  IN  BULK.  Put  up  in  one-half  pound  packages.  Price 

per  pound.  SI. 75:  per  half  pound.  Si. OH. 

,  MAGNESIUM  TABEAUX  LIGHTS.  A  metal  capable  of  being  ignited 

by  a  common  match,  and  burning  with  great  brilliancy.  This  is  the  best  light  for 
moonlight  and  statuary.  Price  per  package,  50  cents:  per  dozen,  S2.50. 

LIGHTNING  FOR  PRIVATE  THEATRICALS.  We  will  send  a 

FLASH  BOX  and  material  for  this  purpose,  with  full  printed  directions  for  their  use, 
to  any  address,  for  50  cents.  The  effect  produced  by  it  will  be  found  all  that  can  be 
desired. 

BLUE.  For  unshaven  faces.  This  is  very  necessary  in  low  comedy  characters.  Price 

per  box,  25  cents. 

PREPARED  BURNT  CORK.  For  Negro  minstrels.  This  article  we  can 
recommend,  as  it  can  be  taken  off  as  easily  as  put  on ;  in  which  it  differs  from  most  all 
others  manufactured.  Enough  for  25  performances  in  each  box.  Price  per  box,  40  cents. 

COCOA  BUTTER. .  This  article  is  necessary  to  every  lady  or  gentleman  wheth¬ 
er  on  the  stage  or  in  private  life,  as  it  smoothes  the  skin  and  keeps  it  from  chapping.  It 
is  a  very  handy  means  of  removing  the  make-up,  as  a  piece  of  Cocoa  Butter  passed  over 
the  face  will  loosen  all  adheasive  matter  so  thoroughly  as  to  admit  of  being  wiped  off 
the  face  at  once  and  completely.  Should  be  used  before  making  up.  Price,  25  cents. 

CARMINE.  For  the  face,  and  to  heighten  the  effect  of  Burnt  Cork  in  Negro 
characters.  Price  per  box,  30  cents. 

PREPARED  DUTCH  PINK.  For  pale,  sallow,  and  wan  complexions. 

Price  per  box,  25  cents. 

CHROME.  For  sallow  complexions,  also  for  lightening  the  eyebrows,  mustaches, 
etc.  Price  per  box,  25  cents. 

EMAIL  NOIR.  To  stop  out  teeth  for  old  men  characters,  witches,  eto. 

price  4-0  cents. 

PREPARED  FULLER’S  EARTH.  To  powder  the  face  before* ‘making 

up.”  Price,  30  cents. 

JOINING  PASTE,  For  joining  bald  fronts  of  wigs  to  forehead.  Price  per  stick, 
15  cents. 

MASCARO.  or  WATER  COSMETIQUE.  For  darkening  the  eye¬ 
brows  and  mustaches,  without  greasing  them,  and  making  them  prominent.  Brown  or 
black,  60  cents.  » 

MONGOLIAN.  For  Indians,  Mulattoes,  etc.  Price  per  box,  30  cents. 
PASTE  POWDER.  To  enlarge  the  shape  of  the  nose  for  low  comedy  char¬ 
acters,  etc.  Price  per  box,  30  cents. 

PREPARED  NOSE  PUTTY.  Used  for  the  same  purpose  as  Paste  Powder 
and  used  in  the  same  way.  Price,  25  cents. 

RUDDY  ROUGE.  For  sunburnt  faces.  Most  essential  for^low  comedy, 
country  or  seaman’s  character.  Price  per  box,  30  cents. 

SPIRIT  GUM.  The  best  in  use,  prepared  expressly  for  securing  mustaches,  etc. 
Price,  25  cents.  » 

SKIN  MUSTACHE  MASKS.  For  hiding  the  mustache  in  powder  costume 
pieces,  negress  characters,  etc.  Price,  15  cents. 

PO  WDERED  ANTIMONY.  For  shading  the  hollows  of  the  eyes.  Price  per 
box  30  cents  a 

PREPARED  WHITING.  For  Pantomimes,  Clown’s  Faces,  Statuary,  eto. 
Price  per  box,  25  cents. _ _ 


No. 

tt 


CREAM  STICK  PAINTS. 

1— Very  Light  Flesh  Color.  No.  10 — Sallow,  for  old  age. 


For  Juvenile 
Heroes. 


2—  Deeper  Tint  Flesh  Color. 

3—  Natural  Flesh, 

4 —  Rose  Tint, 

5 —  Deeper  Shade, . 

6 —  Healthy  Sunburnt. 

7—  Healthy  Sunburnt,  deeper  shade. 

8 —  Sallow,  for  young  men. 

9—  Healthy  Color,  for  middle  age. 


tt 

u 
tt 
t. 
tt 
tt 
tt 


tt 
tt 


1 —  Ruddy. 

2—  Olive,  healthy. 

3—  Olive,  lighter  shade. 

4—  Gipsy  Flesh  Color. 

5 —  Othello. 

— Chinese. 

■Indian. 

I— East  Indian. 


j— Jap. 

Done  up  in  sticks  4  inches  in  length  at  25  cents  each;  8-inch  sticks,  60  cents.  Lining 
Colors,  4  inches  long,  at  10  cents  each,  except  Carmine  which  is  16  cents. 

A  box  of  Cream  Stioks,  containing  the  following  colors  ;  Two  shades  of  Flesh,  one 
Black,  me  Brown,  one  Lake,  one  Crimson,  one  White,  one  Carmine,  and  a  oolor  far 
Shading  Wrinkles,  *1.00. 


JLmEB’  Plays—  G  antinnEfl. 


NO. 


M  P 


FARCES  &  COMEDIETTA  S. 

129  Aar-u-ag-oos .  2  1 

132  Actor  and  Servant . . .  1  1 

12  A  Capita  Match .  3  2 

166  ATexan  Mother-in-Law .  4  6 

30  A  Day  Well  Spent .  7  5 

169  A  Regular  Fix .  2  4 

80  Alarmingly  Suspicious .  4  3 

78  An  Awfi.l  Criminal .  3  3 

65  An  Unwelcome  Return .  3  1 

31  A  Pet  of  the  Public .  4  2 

21  A  Romantic  Attachment .  3  3 

123  A  Thrilling  Item .  3  1 

20  A  Ticket  of  Leave .  3  2 

175  Betsey  Baker .  2  2 

8  Better  Half .  5  2 

86  Black  vs.  White . 4  2 

22  Captain  Smith . -  3  3 

84  Cheek  Will  Win . 3  0 

225  Cupids  Capers .  4  4 

49  Der  Two  Surprises .  1  1 

72  Deuce  is  in  Him . . .  5  1 

19  Did  .  Dream  it. .  4  3 

42  Domestic  Felicity .  1  1 

188  Dutch  Prize  Fighter .  3  0 

22^  Dutchy  vs.  Nigger....- . 3  0 

14s  Eh?  What  Did  You  Say .  3  1 

218  Everybody  Astonished .  4  0 

224  Fooling  with  the  Wrong  Man  2  1 

233  Freezing  a  Mother-in-Law...  2  1 

154  Fun  in  a  Post  Office .  4  2 

184  Family  Discipline .  0  1 

274  Family  Jars . 5  2 

209  Goose  with  the  Golden  Eggs..  5  3 

13  Give  Me  My  Wife . * .  3  3 

66  Hans,  the  Dutch  J.  P .  3  1 

271  Hans  Brummel’s  Cafe . 5  0 

116  Hash .  4  2 

120  H.  M.  S.  Plum .  1  1 

103  How  Sister  Paxey  got  her 

Child  Baptized .  2  1 

50  How  She  has  Own  Way .  1  3 

140  How  He  Popped  the  Quest’n.  1  1 

74  How  to  Tame  M-in-Law .  4  2 

35  How  Stout  Your  Getting .  5  2 

47  In  the  Wrong  Box . 3  0 

95  _*n  the  Wrong  Clothes . .  5  3 

11  John  Smith . 5  3 

99  Jumbo  Jum . -4  3 

82  Killing  Time .  1  1 

182  kittie’s  Wedding  Cake .  1  3 

127  Lick  Skillet  Wedding .  2  2 

228  Lauderbach’s  Little  Surprise  3  0 

106  Lodgings  for  Two . ~  3  0 

139  Matrimonial  Bliss .  1  1 

231  Match  for  a  other-Min-Law..  2  2 

235  More  Blunders  than  one .  4  3 

69  Mother’s  Fool . 6  1 

158  M r. Hudson’s  Tiger  Hunt...™  1  1 

23  My  Heart’s  in  Highlands .  4  3 

208  My  Precious  Betsey .  4  4 

.12  My  Turn  Next .  4  3 

^32  My  Wife’s  Relations .  4  4 


NO. 


186  My  Day  and  Now-a-Days .  0 

273  My  Neighbor’s  Wife....,../....  3 

44  Obedience . 1 

244  Old  Clothes .  3 

33  On  the  Sly . ™ . 3 

246  Othello . .>..., .  4 

57  Paddy  Miles’  Boy . 5 

217  Paten"  Washing  Machine . 4 

165  Persecuted  Dutchman . 6 

195  Poor  Pilicody . 2 

258  Prof.Bones ’Latest  Invention  5 

159  Quiet  Family .  4 

171  Rough  Diamond . 4 

180  Ripples . . . . 

267  Room  44 . 2 

48  Schnaps .  1 

138  Sewing  Circle  of  Period . ™  0 

115  S.  H.  A.  M.  Pinafore .  3 

55  Somebody’s  Nobody .  3 

243  Sports  on  a  Lark . ! .  3 

232  Stage  Struck  Yankee . .  4 

238  Strawberry  Shortcake...., .  2 

270  Slick  and  Skinner . „  5 

1  Slasher  and  Crasher .  5 

137  Taking  the  Census .  1 

40  Th  it  Mysterious  B’dle .  2 

245  Ticket  Taker .  3 

38  -The  Bewitched  Closet .  5 

131  The  Cigarette .  4 

101  The  Coming  Man . 3 

167  Turn  Him  Out . . . „.  3 

68  The  Sham  Professor . 4 

54  The  Two  T.  J’s . 4 

253  The  Best  Cure .  4 

28  Thirty-three  Next  Birthday..  4 

142  Tit  for  Tat .  2 

276  The  Printer  and  His  Devils..  3 

263  Trials  of  a  Country  Editor....  6 

7  The  Wonderful  Telephone....  3 

269  Unjust  Justice .  6 

213  Vermont  Wool  Dealer...™ . 5 

151  Wanted  a  Husband .  2 

56  Wooing  Under  Difficulties™...  5 

70  Which  will  he  Marry..™ .  2 

135  Widower’s  Trials . 4 

147  Waking  Him  Up . 1 

155  Why  they  Joined  the  Re¬ 
beccas . 0 

111  Yankee  Duelist .  3 

157  Yankee  Peddler .  7 

ETHIOPIAN  FARCES. 

204  Academy  of  Stars .  6 

15  An  Unhappy  Pair . . . 1 

172  Black  Shoemaker . 4 

98  Black  Statue .  4 

222  Colored  Senators .  3 

214  Chops . 3 

145  Cuff’s  Luck . 2 

190  Crimps  Trip . 5 

249  Double  Election .  9 

27  Fetter  Lane  to  Gravesend . 2 

230  Hamlet  the  Dainty .  6 

153  Haunted  House . - . 2 


F 

1 

3 

2 

0 

2 

1 

2 

1 

3 

3 

0 

.4 

3 

0 

0 

1 

5 

3 

2 

0 

2 

0 

0 

2 

1 

2 

0 

2 

2 

1 

2 

0 

2 

1 

2 

1 

1 

2 

1 

2 

3 

1 

3 
8 
5 
2 

4 
1 

3 


0 

1 

2 

2 

0 

0 

1 

0 

1 

0 

1 

0 


/ 


w  E ~  ^ 

iimes’  Plays— CnntimiEd. 


NO.  M.  F, 

ETHIOPIAN  FARCES— CONT’UED. 


24 
230 
247 

77 

88 

250 

128 

259 

90 

'01 

234 

150 

109 

134 

177 

90 

107 

133 

179 

94 

25 
92 

241 

10 

04 

252 

122 


Handy  Andy... . . . 

Hypochondriac  The  . 

Incompatibility  of  Temper... 

Joe’s  Vis  t . 

Mischievous  Nigger . 

Midnight  Colic . 

Musical  Darkey . 

Nobody’s  Moke . 

No  Cure  No  Pay . . . 

Not  as  Deaf  as  He  Seems . 

Old  Dad’s  Cabin . 

OldPompey . 

Other  People’s  Children . 

Pomp’s  Pranks . 

Suarrebome  Servants . 

ooms  to  Let . 

School . 

Seeing  Bosting . 

Sham  Doctor . . . 

16,000  Years  Ago . 

Sport  with  a  Sportsman . 

Stage  Struck  Darkey . 

Struck  by  Lightning . 

Stocks  Up,  Stocks  Down . 

That  Boy  Sam . „ 

That  Awful  Carpet  Bag . 

The  Select  School . 


2  0 
2  0 


2  0 
5  2 


2  1 
1  1 


3  2 
2  0 
3  0 
2  1 
5  0 
3  0 


3  0 
2  0 
2  1 


NO. 

118 

6 

108 

4 

197 

198 
170 
210 
206 
210 
203 
205 
156 


17 

130 


M.  F. 


The  Popcorn  Man .  3 

The  Studio . 3 

Those  Awful  Boys .  5 

Twain’s  Dodging . 3 

Tricks.... .  5 

Uncle  Jeff . 5 

U.  S.  Mail . 2 

Vice  Versa . 3 

Villkens  and  Dinah . 4 

Virginia  Mummy . 6 

Who  Stole  the  Chickens .  1 

William  Tell .  4 

Wig-Maker  and  His  Servants  3 

GUIDE  BOOKS. 


Hints  on  Elocution. 
Hints  to  Amateurs.. 


CANTATA. 

215  On  to  Victory . . .  4  6 

TABLEAUX. 

250  Festival  of  Days  ..’ . 

PANTOMIME. 

260  Cousin  John’s  Album . 


MAKE  YOUR  OWN  WIGS! 

- - - 

PREPARED  WOOL. 

PEEP  ABED  WOOL  IS  AN  ABTICLE  THAT  EVE  BY  ONE, 
WITHOUT  ANY  EXPEBIEN C  E,  CAN 
MAKE  INTO 

WIGS! 

BEARDS! 

MUSTACHES  ! 

ETC.,  ETC. 

AT  VEBY  LITTLE  COST  AND  WILL  BE  SUB E  TO  GIVE 

SATISFACTION. 

PRICE  50  CENTS  PER  OUNCE. 

Address, 

AMES’  PUBLISHING  CO., 

LOCK  BOX  152.  CLYDE,  OHIO 


3-1. 


* 

*  ■ 

I 


t 


* 


1 


